Funny Reeses Peanut Butter Cup Halloween Cartoons
Last week, I shared with you some important information: which Halloween candies are the very best, and which are the absolute worst (but of course you'll still eat them when all of the good ones are gone). Butterfinger, Laffy Taffy, Mounds, Peppermint Pattie (and Junior Mints), Smarties, Sour Patch Kids, Take 5, and Whoppers deserve our eternal love. Almond Joy, Dum Dums, Everlasting Gobstopper, Milk Duds, Milky Way (and 3 Musketeers), and Twizzlers are for the birds. Literally. I fed them to the birds on Nov. 1. Was I not supposed to do that?
Then came the reckoning.
I was completely, totally wrong. No, wait, completely, totally right. Those of you who weighed in via comments, e-mails, and an online survey were deeply divided but equally filled with conviction. "Oh my goodness. How can somebody have such bad taste in candy? Butterfingers? Laffy Taffy? Those are candies you trade to some naive small child for good stuff. Whoppers (not to be confused with the English Malteasers) are only good for throwing at your sister. And giving out Smarties will get your windows soaped where I come from," declared one appalled survey respondent. "You are amazingly correct about everything, EVERYTHING. Brava! Don't listen to the haters. (Except you're wrong about Whoppers. Whoppers are trash.)," countered a mostly sagacious commenter with the handle treelover21. To both I say: Please deliver any Whoppers you may have received to the Boston Globe office at your earliest convenience.
From all of the opinions, one incontrovertible truth emerged: People really, really love Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. "Okay, let's settle it. Which candy in the rankings is superior to you?," asked our survey. Out of 4,108 respondents, 893 — or 22 percent — ranked them No. 1.
I get it, I really do. As I wrote, "I understand the love for the soft-bellied Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, and I share it to a degree. But I'll take Butterfinger — a candy bar with backbone, a candy bar that continues to assert its presence long after it's gone, adhering to your molars in salty defiance of the probing tongue." This led a number of you to accuse me of shilling for the American Dental Association.
Next on the list were Snickers (544 votes) and — vindicated! — Butterfingers (538), both taking about 13 percent of the vote. The combination of chocolate and peanuts is simply hard to beat.
I knew I was courting controversy by excluding the Kit Kat, which I consider a mid-tier Halloween option. Eight percent of survey respondents count it tops. I also believed Twix to be a serious crowd-pleaser and was surprised to find it at just No. 9 on the list, with 6 percent of the vote. Respondents proved their wisdom by elevating the York Peppermint Pattie (8 percent), with its invigorating, mind-clearing mint-chocolate properties. And, again to my surprise as well as my delight, the Take 5 has garnered a deserved fanbase (6 percent). If you know, you know. (And many of you who have never sampled these nuggets of perfection promised to try them soon.)
Way down yonder on the candy list are Sour Patch Kids (2 percent), Twizzlers, candy corn, Hershey's Kisses and minis, Tootsie Rolls and Tootsie Pops, Skittles, and Smarties (all 1 percent). I expected more love for Twizzlers and Skittles. Not, however, the much-loathed candy corn. For those of you who asked my opinion of the iconic ombre Halloween treat …
… I like it. I like candy corn. I'll shout it from the rooftops, and I suspect at least half the haters simply enjoy being ornery. Candy corn is great, provided it's Brach's. It's too sweet, to be sure, but the flavor is excellent. It's made with real honey! And it is an absolutely perfect pairing with a cup of strong, black coffee.
I admit there may have been some flaws in our survey design: We lumped together completely fine plain M&Ms with the vastly superior peanut M&Ms (7 percent). Same with the excellent Tootsie Roll Pop and the Tootsie Roll, which is basically the gnat of Halloween; it's everywhere and you just try to ignore it.
And then there is my favorite category, Other Option, coming in at No. 4 (9 percent). Dark chocolate fans felt shortchanged, with many arguing for the Milky Way Dark. (I was also informed that my Milky Way antipathy could be cured by freezing them, which I shall attempt next year.) Also missed: the deeply worthy 100 Grand, Heath and Skor bars, Baby Ruth, and Payday.
Where were the Sky Bars, you wanted to know? Sadly, not in the Halloween candy bowl, the only reason they were not included. "Where's Raisinets?," someone asked. "When I eat Raisinets, I feel like I am being bad, but I am also being good." I appreciated mentions of great candy rarely seen anymore (Bit-O-Honey forever!) and memorials to defunct excellence. See: the Marathon bar, my childhood favorite, a braid of caramel dipped in chocolate. It was so good.
Shoutout to the delightfully sassy Harper, age 8, who let me know: "Twizzlers don't taste like soap, girl!" And sibling Connor, who turned 10 on Halloween, weighed in: "Milky Way and Three Musketeers are amazing." Connor, happy birthday. I got you a present. (It's all my rejected Milky Way and 3 Musketeers bars.)
I learned things along the way. "An acquaintance who works as an animal control officer told me that Twix are the best bait for attracting and trapping nuisance skunks," according to commenter Highandinside. Necco Wafers were apparently sometimes used to teach kids how to take Communion. And in the 1950s, mikef7777 says, Almond Joy and Mounds cost a dime, twice as expensive as every other candy bar.
As for those who chastised me about my inattention to healthful eating, I'll let AL5000 take us out: "Go eat an apple. This article is about candy."
Devra First can be reached at devra.first@globe.com. Follow her on Twitter @devrafirst.
Boston Globe video
Source: https://www.bostonglobe.com/2021/11/02/lifestyle/wow-you-all-really-love-reeses-peanut-butter-cups/
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